Tuesday, June 21, 2011

What Type of Fan Are You?

The walls of this cubicle are closing in and as I glance to my left at the nifty SEC helmet schedule, I notice something else closing in, too: kickoff time.

This got me to looking forward to not just the games. Oh, no. It got me looking forward to tailgating, viewing parties, and smack talk. Having said that, I think we all know, work with, are related to, etc. different types of fans. This can be a good thing, but it can also be a bad thing.

What type of fan are you? Every year I have to remind certain people as I enter the season that I am "cautiously optimistic". I've delved into "certain pessimism" these past 2 years, but I honest to God thing we're on the cusp of turning the corner. I credit 3 things: the arrival of Todd Grantham (the change in D and the fiery attitude he brings), JT2 taking over the S&C program (I present to the jury Exhibit A: the booting of one Washaun Ealey because he wanted to half ass it), and the apparent change in attitude in Coach Richt.

Granted, with all the changes we've made and all the new talent coming in, we might not see the best results until next year, but I do think we're in store for something special this year.

Back to my original question, what type of fan are you? I categorize fans the following ways:

  • The Deranged/Delusional Fan that, no matter the previous record or current talent level or schedule, thinks this is the year: Also known as the This Is The Year Fan. Most South Carolina Gamecock fans fall into this category and good God if the sportswriters in Columbia aren't following suit. This is the fan that gets laughed at while at work as he spews this madness, but you don't wait until he leaves to laugh. You do it in his face...IN HIS FACE!

  • The "I Can Dish It Out, But I Can't Take It" Fan: See: Tech, Georgia.

  • The Damn The Past, We're Good This Year Fan: This was Auburn last year. Good God, I've never been so appalled at such tacky behavior. A little background for you: my family is 75% AU. I have 2 uncles and both are AU alums. Their kids went to AU. One of their kids married a former AU O-lineman. The family is awash in ernge and blue. This never bothered me nor did I ever root against them (except when they were playing us, obviously) until last year. I quacked my ass off during the BCS title game. Anyway, the whole Scam Newton fiasco got louder and louder the better he played and the more they won. After they played us last year and watching Fairley's antics along with his handler, Trooper "Beat Cop" Taylor, I wanted a bench-clearing brawl that would have left the bastards strewn about and result in massive suspensions on our part due to the carnage. My days of rooting for AU are over. I will join Simple Man on the hate train. Toot x 2, Weagles.

  • The Loves the Camaraderie Fan: This is me. I can co-mingle with other fan bases as long as everyone understands the barbs are for fun. I've tailgated with Cocks at a SC game in Athens before. I've encountered 1 or 2 friendly Gators at the World's Largest Outdoor Cocktail Party before that invited me into their RV to use their latrine (I didn't flush out of pure spite). I've even been invited the last few years to tailgate at a Bama game (and damn sure will just because of the host's reputation and generosity). I cannot, tho, handle being around obnoxious asshats that take every dig personally and are ready to throw down when everyone else is enjoying themselves.

  • The Sh*t Talker No Matter The Record Fan: I saw one of these at the UK game in Lexington last year. It was beyond comical. I don't give a damn how good your basketball team is or was, you need to shut the hell up about football. OMG.

There are already murmurs out of Tuscaloosa that the Tide are back on track. There are whispers of a potent offense out of Columbia. The loudest vibes I hear are that the Dawgs of Athens are ready to put the nation on notice and Boise State is in the cross hairs.

Why yes, I will take some more Kool-Aid. Thank you very little.


Reverend Whitewall said...

You're getting dangerously close to Blutarsky's definition of Preseason Homerism, LC.



LCUGA said...

Guilty...of cautious optimism.